Why does overwhelm happen?
Life can feel like too much sometimes. The world is loud, fast, and unpredictable, and for autistic adults, that can mean dealing with constant sensory overload, social exhaustion, and decision fatigue. Feeling overwhelmed isn’t just about being stressed—it’s about experiencing too much at once, making it hard to function.
I’ve been there. Some days, even small things feel impossible. One time, I went to a restaurant with a friend and joined a quiz night—huge mistake. We sat right next to the stereo, and my energy bar started draining like a Sims character about to pass out. The chairs annoyed me. The lights annoyed me. The music? Too much. I slapped on my noise-canceling headphones like it was an emergency oxygen mask—instant relief! But when I got home, my body ached like I’d run a marathon. The next day? Full vampire mode—curtains closed, only candles for light, and I worked in the dark like some mysterious cave-dwelling writer.
Over time, I’ve learned that small, intentional habits can help me manage the overwhelm and create a sense of balance. They won’t fix everything, but they can make life a little easier. Here are five habits that have helped me, and they might help you too.
1. Start the Day with a Sensory Check-In
Mornings can set the tone for the entire day. Before jumping into tasks, I take a moment to check in with my body and senses. I move my body a little, stretch, and—because I think I’m a witch—I light a candle and burn incense. I buy my incense from Nature & Découverte; their scents are so good. My favorite is amber. I only recently realized how much smell helps me feel in my body, and now, I can’t start the day without it.
2. Limit Decision Fatigue
Making too many decisions throughout the day drains my energy. The more choices I have to make, the more overwhelmed I feel. So, I reduce unnecessary decisions by setting up routines and defaults:
- I eat the same breakfast every day.
- I plan my day the night before—no extra thinking, no unnecessary blabla in my head.
- I use the 5-second rule from Mel Robbins to avoid overthinking and just do the thing.
The fewer small decisions I have to make, the more energy I have for things that matter.
3. Take Sensory Breaks
Throughout the day, sensory overload builds up. If I don’t take breaks, it turns into exhaustion. Scheduling short sensory resets helps prevent burnout.
- Meditation? No, not that kind! I listen to bilateral sounds or, my new favorite, EMDR bilateral stimulation. Imagining an object moving in my head while listening to it is instant relief for me.
- Quiet Time: Wearing noise-canceling headphones or sitting in silence for a few minutes.
- Tactile Stimulation: Running my hands under cool water, holding a soft object, or pressing my feet into the ground.
Even five minutes of a sensory break can help me recharge and handle the rest of the day more easily.
4. Move Your Body to Release Tension
When I feel overwhelmed, my body holds onto that stress. Moving helps reset my system, even if it’s just stretching, shaking out my hands, or dancing like an idiot when nobody’s watching. Movement doesn’t have to mean exercise—it just has to be something that helps you let go of the day.
I want to have a proper bedtime routine… but let’s be real—I don’t. For now, I brush my teeth, do some squats, and go to bed. One day, I’ll build a relaxing nighttime ritual, but for now, that’s where I’m at.
5. Be Kind to Yourself
Some days, even the best habits don’t stop the overwhelm from hitting. And that’s okay. Now, more and more, I remind myself that it’s okay to feel tired and that it doesn’t mean I’m lazy . Instead of pushing through, I let myself relax for real—without thinking about everything I need to do or the people I have to respond to. I put on a cartoon and just exist. And you know what? I always feel better the next day. Because at the end of the day, I’m just a pattern. A predictable, tired, overstimulated pattern. Haha.
When Overwhelm Becomes Physical
For the longest time, I didn’t realize that my body pain—my joint aches, my muscle tightness—was from stress and anxiety. I did all the medical tests, and everything came back fine. Then I noticed a pattern: these pains showed up right before an appointment, a flight, an interview. Now, when I start feeling that familiar pain, I know it’s time to take a break, make some tea, and watch cartoons.
Final Thoughts
Feeling overwhelmed isn’t something that can be completely avoided, but small, daily habits can make it easier to manage. Whether it’s checking in with your senses, limiting decisions, taking breaks, winding down at night, or simply being kind to yourself, these habits create space to breathe.
If you’ve been struggling with constant overwhelm, start with just one habit. See how it feels, adjust it to work for you, and build from there. Little by little, these small changes can make a big difference.
